Roy's Best Mistake, A Pranker Gone Right?
by SoSChik
Summary: A pranker gets into trouble. Will she like the outcome or will she crack under pressure?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 Oops**

It all started when I pranked him. My name is Kitsune or Kit for short. Yes I'm an alchemist and in the military. I like to prank people, especially when I know I will get in trouble. So naturally pranking Roy Mustang was my favorite idea. The day had come to prank Roy in front of everyone.

We were all called out for a 'meeting' or so everyone thought. Reality was I was getting a head start on a week's worth of pranking Roy. Today Roy, Alphonse, Edward, and Armstrong were giving a speech.

My prank was (hopefully) going to work. I hid something special inside the podium. Roy was first. The surprise was to happen soon. He started to introduce everyone who was to give a speech.

He started to stutter. It started. The surprise, his special surprise, was a woman who started to tickle the inside of his legs. Oh yes, I was thinking of having her do something else but instead didn't.

He was starting to look around for the culprit who put her there. When his eyes scanned over me I wanted to scream, his cold eyes held nothing but hatred for the culprit (me). _OH NO_, I thought wanting to run, wanting to get out of here.

His stony eyes paused on me. He knew I was the culprit. _God help me now_, my mind swirled. I felt like I was going to faint. Had I not been next to Jean I would have had a lot more trouble.

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><p>After the 'meeting' I was called into Roy's office, all my trouble started then.<p>

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><p>"Miss Kitsune Hana do you understand that you are in serious trouble." Roy started.<p>

"Yes Colonel Mustang." I whispered

"And you understand that I will make you work 1,000 times harder." He exclaimed making every word clipped in such a way that it urks me.

"Yes Colonel Mustang." I repeated through my teeth. Yes he was getting to me.

"And you understand you can't hide this time." Colonel Roy Mustang (ugh) emphasized this jut to get his piont across.

"Yes Colonel Mustang." I (once again) repeated this time with a different tone. Not bad different either.

"Now Miss Kitsune Hana. You must understand to not prank ever again." He suck into his chair.

I jumped out of the chair I was just in, "Surely you must be kidding Sir."

"No Miss Hana you are no longer permitted to prank." He stared to sift through papers on his desk.

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><p>Thanks for reading. Hiding under podium from police academy. I do not own anything<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 Off**

Mustang thought our conversation was over but I tried to start our conversation over again throughout the rest of the month. _God if I knew that pranking him would stop my pranking I wouldn't have done it, _I thought pacing my office.

I still think _he should take a stick and shove it up his_… My thoughts were cut off my Jean running into my office. "Kit, is he serious?" Jean was having a panic attack.

Jean Havoc was my best friend and pranking-bud. But having been ban from pranking, I've kinda let up on hanging out with him. "Yup, and sadly if I disobey him I get kicked out."

"That's unfreaking fear!" Jean was getting worked up again. "Jean it is my fault." I waved my hands to calm him down. "You only pranked him." Havoc started to rant on about the importance of pranking.

My headache formed a little after. Yeah I do understand the importance of pranking but his rant got old.

"I'm going to have to leave." I looked at the time. Roy had kept his word of working me harder. And now my hours were 5 PM to 10 AM. God I'm tired.

All I want to do is lay is a nice soft comfy bed not a cot._ Stupid Roy he thinks he's all that but he's not, _I was thinking on my way to his office to find out my job of the night.

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><p>"On time, only if that happened yesterday." Roy's cold voice rang from behind his desk when I entered.<p>

"I'm sorry about my lateness yesterday." I apologized because Roy would have grilled me if I didn't.

"Well Miss Hana I understand that you will be sorry after tonight."Roy once again sent chills down my spine.

* * *

><p>It was now midnight and I was day (night) dreaming of my bedroom.<p>

"You should take a break." Roy's voice echoed through the halls of the corridor I was walking in at the moment.

"You sure sir? I do think I've done enough work." I comment reverting to my old shy self.

"Trust me you've worked hard enough, Kit." The colonel used my nickname.

I instantly thought that he was just toying with me.

"Kay but only for 5 minutes." I left for my 'break'.

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><p>I do not own anything. I know I made Roy seem evil, but that's what I need right now. I do not follow any storyline but my own. I made jean really different then he was when I say hi.<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 Vodka and Tears

My 'break' was just me doing more work. After 5 minutes I just continued the rest of my work. I ran papers, did paperwork, and checked up on a few people and their family. I was ready for sleep.

"Miss Hana. You think you can leave without taking that break." Roy's voice echoed down the hall.

"I did take a break sir. It was from the work you made me do not personal work." I told him while tightening the grip on the file I held.

"Don't do it again or you _will be kicked out_." The last part he said through gritted teeth.

My back straightened and I turn on my heels. "Sir you always use the same threat and frankly I don't care anymore. I have all I need to put that man in his rightful place!" I couldn't take it anymore I wanted the man who killed my family dead.

I must have said too much because Roy froze, his eyes were wide and his mouth was hanging half open. "Kit you. Who did what?"

"Roy it's not your fault." My voice softened, "Envy killed my family every last one of them suffered at that mans hands." I couldn't hold it in any more I turned around, grabbed the door and let out the first tear.

_**Flashback**_

_13 year old Kitsune sat on the stairs from her room to the attack. Her parents told her to hide and the attack was the best place she could think of. She heard her mother scream then nothing. She thought 'please let papa be ok because mama is not '. She heard a single gunshot and a man tell some to find the children. She then crept back into the attack and hid inside a box. Last thing she heard before falling asleep was the rest of her family being shot to death. Two hours had elapsed and the cops found a single living for in her house. She was the final living person left in her family. Years later they found her aunt and she died three weeks after Kitsune moved in._

_**Flashback End**_

I ran home. That memory was killing me. Questions are left unanswered; answers were left without any question. I didn't realize Roy followed me till I shut the door and heard hi yell "Kit, I didn't know what happened! Kit, will you listen to me?" the last part was almost a whisper.

I slowly opened the door. I knew the tears were making my eyes puffy. Roy watched the door slowly, slowly creep open. His eyes then focused on me. He saw how hard I was crying. He saw me holding the file so close my fingers turned white. And finally he saw the scar I hid from everyone including Jean.

"Kit please." He started. I walked to the couch. "Please come in Roy. I want to tell you the whole story.

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><p>"And a couple years later I found my last living relative, my aunt and she was murdered three weeks after I moved in." I said wiping the last tears from my eyes.<p>

Roy sat patiently as I told him the whole story. After I finished he seemed agitated. I thought at first that he would punch my wall or something. But what he did was go to the kitchen and get a drink (yes I do keep drinks in my house).

"Umm Roy are you sure you want a drink? You still need to go home." I had followed him wanting to just go to bed.

"Yes Miss Hana. And no I'm not going home, I'm staying here." Roy informed me.

"Uh, no you're not." I said a little confused at him.

"Yes I am and that's final!" He growled and took my last vodka.

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><p>I don't own anything but Kitsune and the new guy in the next chapter.<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4 House & Home**

I set up a spot for Roy on my couch. I took 5 minutes to find a blanket. I had it all set up and all Roy did was watch the tele.

"Thanks for nothing." I told Roy sarcastically.

"You're welcome." Roy smirked. I threw a pillow at him. "Kit, you asked for it." Roy declared as he threw the pillow back.

Somehow I started a pillow fight with a single pillow. There came a knock came at my door. I was hit by the pillow last but ignored it. Opening the door was like opening a memory.

"Kitty!" Was what I heard before being pulled into a hug.

"Wolfy?" I asked into the man.

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><p>Wolf, or Wolfy as I called him, is a childhood friend who (thankfully) didn't die. He is tall, muscular, and goofy. Wolf always had my back until two years ago.<p>

* * *

><p>"Hey buddy!" The goofy man in front of me laughed.<p>

"Wolfy, come in." I laughed totally forgetting about Roy.

"Wolfy?" Roy's voice scared the living daylights out of me.

"Oh, Roy this is Wolf; Wolf this is Roy." I said after a moment thinking my words out.

"Why, hello Roy. What is your relationship with Kitty?" Wolf Said being as straight forward as ever.

"Why?" Roy almost seemed like he was an alpha dog being challenged.

"Because she doesn't let just anyone stay overnight." Wolf pointed at the couch.

"Oh? Kitsune is in the military and I am her boss." Roy smirk became wider.

I had gone into the kitchen and came back with rum. I gave Wolf a glass and had one for myself. Roy still had the last of my Vodka.

"Sorry it's not Vodka, Wolf, but the last of it is there." I said pointing at Roy's hand in which the glass of Vodka was in.

"Well its fine but I need to tell you why I'm here." Wolfy stated. "After our last encounter I found your original house." Wolf paused

"You found my home?" I asked so quiet it was barely heard.

"Funny how you call that home and this a house." Wolf said at my grammatical mistake.

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><p>I don't own anything but Kitsune and Wolf. I know it is slow at the moment but it will speed up soon. R&amp;R.<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Wolf was now in the kitchen making breakfast/dinner. Roy gingerly sipped my vodka. I turned the Telle off and the radio on.

The song _Just a Kiss_ came on. I gently sang with it. *_Laying here with you so close to me. It's hard to fight these feelings, when it's so hard to breath__ caught up in this moment caught up in your smile__*_ When the male voice came I just hummed along.

"How did you end up in the army with a voice like that?" Wolf asked plating our food.

"Easy, it was the only thing hiring a year ago." I got up to help him.

"What'd you do for the other four years?"Wolf questioned.

"I sang and told fortunes. "I sat a plate in front of Roy.

"Is it palatable?" Roy questioned Wolf's cooking.

"Add salt," Wolf sat with his food.

I came back with my food. I sat in between Roy and Wolf. Wolf made tuna noodle casserole. It may sound bad but the way he makes it is the best.

I finished first. I noted that Roy seemed to glare at Wolf. I had only been from the room for 5 minutes and when I came back…

"What the hell?" I saw my living room trashed. Roy and Wolf were in a dead lock.

"Kit you have a horrible boss." Wolf said holding Roy's throat.

"And a stupid friend." Roy had a hold of Wolf's gun he carries everywhere.

"No I don't." I turned on my heel and went through the door to my room. "I have idiots in my home and I'm going to bed." As an afterthought I added, "You two decide where who is going to sleep where."

I slammed the door with a **thud**. I heard arguing for a minute then silence. I changed into a tank top and shorts. My sheets are pure black and fuzzy.

I crawled into bed and was out like a light.

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><p>Sorry it was short. I still don't own anything but the two characters I created.<p> 


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